The Puckering Gazette
|Volume XXVII, No. 11||
Saturday March 27, 1999 50p.
Cuppa with Shirley
House and Gardens
|Lottery Winners Buy Stoney Grove|
Early yesterday afternoon, Simon Tinsley, representing himself and co-purchaser Ann Simmons, sank their American lottery winnings into Stoney Grove, the ancestral home of the Blake family. The two paid an undisclosed sum for the house, estate and contents. A spokesman for the firm of David and David, the solicitors who had been holding the house in trust for the last four years, said simply, "We are very glad to get rid of it."
"This is a marvelous property and it is wonderful that it has gone to such energetic young people with the funds to restore Stoney Grove to the architectural gem that it once was," remarked Selwyn Black of Selwyn Black Estate Agents of London and Upper Puckering on the day the papers were signed, noting that other prestige properties were listed with his firm.
Whilst information is sketchy, local sources disclosed that Mr. Tinsley was born in Britain and related to the nobility. When asked to comment on his outlook for the future of the once-grand estate, the new owner remarked, "Seems like a hell of a lot of work, but Im sure well have fun with it." Little is yet known about Miss Simmons, who was not present at the sale.
The current members of staff were provided for by the late Montgomery Hall and are assured of jobs for life. --Nigel Twicks
|Church Bazaar a
The spring Church Bazaar was held in the Upper Puckering church hall last Saturday and raised 137 pounds, thirty pence. Asked to comment on the success of the event, vicar Nigel Banks said "Frankly, its a little disappointing. We have such needs at the moment and I am hoping that something will come along to help." Amongst the sale items were some unusual culinary treats from Shirley Johnson and an abstract painting by Nigel Worthingtons goldfish that went for one pound. Asked if other great works were in the offing, Mr. Worthington admitted that the fish had not survived the exercise. --Nigel Twicks
|"Flu-Like" Symptoms Flatten
Twenty seven residents of Upper and Lower Puckering were taken to hospital on Sunday complaining of high fever and stomach upset. All were treated and released within 24 hours, although symptoms persisted amongst some for several days. This is the first such attach of widespread illness this year, and doctors are puzzled by its virulence and timing. While health professionals have no explanation, Dr. Nigel Waterfall noted that the onset of symptoms directly following the Church Bazaar may "not be coincidental."--Nigel Twicks